How to Field Off questions about when you are getting Married

“Fade, when are you getting married?”, “Do you have a boyfriend?” “Why aren’t you married?” are some of the rude questions I had to endure as a single lady. Funnily enough, no one asks you why you are married or why you have kids. It is assumed that everyone must want to get married and if you aren’t yet married, you should be unhappy about it.

Really, it’s no-one’s business why you are not yet married. True, most people who ask such questions mean well, but they unwittingly put ladies under pressure to get married. I’m sure none of my readers would want to be party to a woman running hastily into a marriage she will surely regret.

Below are some ways to field off questions about why you aren’t yet married.

Ask the enquirer another question.
You can field off such a question by asking the enquirer another question, without coming across as being unpleasant. If the person asking you is single, you can say something like “Jeez, I don’t know. Why aren’t you yet married? Do you know when you will marry?” This will make the person realize the inappropriateness of such a question. If the person asking you is married, just smile and say something like “Why should I?” or “Why do you ask?”

Divert the conversation.
You can politely divert the questioner’s attention by changing the topic tactfully. Whenever this question comes up, say something like “I really don’t know why. But did you hear that Ade got married to Titi?” The reply will surely divert the questioner’s attention and you can then move the conversation onto safer ground.

Dismiss the question in a polite way.
If someone, say your mum or a person you find annoying asks you about it, dismiss the question by saying something like “I’ll get married (have a boyfriend) when everybody stops asking me about it.” This will surely let the person realize you really don’t wanna talk about it.

There’s really no need to get upset with this question or similar questions. Most people who ask mean well but are insensitive to the discomfort such questions cause. Please, if you do not intend to get married, don’t go into the demerits of marriage especially with a married person. The questioner is going to feel insulted.

Now, I’m sure my male and female readers know just how annoying such questions are and will refrain from asking such in future.

So, It’s my Birthday Today and I’m indeed grateful to God Almighty for his blessings over my Family and I.

Sharing is Caring. Please comment and Share!

xoxo,
Lush

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Expectations of a Married Woman

Marriage is a very serious affair. It ought to last for a lifetime, but sadly enough, some marriages end in divorce. It has become necessary for me to write about the expectations of a married woman at home so that my readers can take with them a few suggestions for their marriages. Whether you are religious or not, you can apply these tips and spice up your marriage because they are tried and true. They cut across all religions (or even the absence of one!)

Be understanding of your husband.
In a marriage, a woman is expected to be understanding of her husband. Men go through a lot of stress trying to ensure that there is always food on the table. They are not as emotional as women are and are more likely to tune you out if you start yelling and go ballistic in the house. If your husband does something that you don’t like, express it in a calm manner and listen for feedback.

Loyalty and confidentiality.
Your first loyalty is to your husband, not to your family or friends. Do learn to discuss all problems with your husband and not with outsiders. If you are having problems in your marriage, seek the opinion of professional marriage counsel lors rather than bringing up the matter with your friends. This will bring the respect of your husband and enable him to confide in you more and more.

Be your husband’s best friend.
In a marriage, a woman should aim to be the best friend her husband will ever have, his go-to person whenever he needs a good laugh or a shoulder to cry on. This is one expectation your husband has, even if he has never voiced it.
Nowadays, gender roles in marriages have become blurred, with the men now picking up the kids after school and women being the breadwinners in many families. The suggestions given herein, if properly applied, will help strengthen your marriage.

Here’s to a happy married life!

xoxo,
Lush

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