Many women often wonder why their relationships fail. They are at their wits’ end as to how to make a man commit to them, how to get him to treat them right and marry them. The common theme in these women’s lives is that they are clearly choosing men who are not husband material—or even relationship material—and hoping that Cupid’s arrow will transform him into their knight in shining armour. The truth is that if you choose a man who is not husband material, you will set yourself up for a lot of pain and heartbreak.
Sometimes, we choose to delude ourselves that he’s just having a depressive episode, he’s having it tough at work etc. and that if we are able to deal with these issues, we will have an amazing relationship with him. Unfortunately, this ain’t ever gonna happen!
We need to take a reality check and consider whether we really want to keep on jumping from one man to another. If a man is husband material, this will be apparent to everyone around you, not just you alone. So read on.
· You can be your true self with him.
If a man is husband material, you can be yourself with him and not put up a front with him. You can tell him what you think, your hopes, past, fears, aspirations knowing that if anything else it will draw him closer to you and make him feel connected with you.
· He takes you into consideration whenever he’s making decisions.
Marriage is all about partnership, not dictatorship. If the man you are with always takes you into account whenever he makes a decision, it shows that he regards you very highly and is husband material.
· He is there for you.
A husband material will definitely be there for you whenever you need him, will hold you up whenever you fall, is there whether it is convenient for him or not and won’t abandon you at the first sign of trouble.
· He is willing to adapt, change and grow.
We are all uniquely flawed human beings. But a man who is husband material is willing to work on his less-developed side and not blame it on you. And you will be expected to do the same too in the relationship. Take for instance a man who can be tardy at times. If he is husband material, he won’t be insensitive about this and expect you to deal with what he calls being fashionably late. He will definitely work on this not-so-pleasant aspect of his character and not expect you to tolerate it from him.
· Both of you are on the same page.
It is imperative for the sake of peace that both of you share similar ideals and values in issues that matter. This refers to matters of faith, whether you will work after marriage, how many children (if any) you plan to have and so on. Is he willing to make compromises or is it my way, right or wrong, my way? A man who is husband material will be willing to compromise and respect your stand where your values differ.
· You communicate about tough issues and don’t sweep them under the carpet.
If the man you are with is husband material, both of you can talk about tough issues and earn his respect. He sees what you have to say as being valid and respects it, even if he doesn’t agree with it. There is no issue in the relationship both of you pretend is not happening. Even when there are fights and one or both of you are not feeling loved, you emerge from it stronger and closer to each other.
· He works on the relationship.
A man who is husband material will regard the relationship with you as being important enough to work upon. For many men, their own version of working on the relationship is by being good at his job so that he can provide you with a comfortable lifestyle.
· He wants to marry you.
A man who is husband material wants to marry you. It is possible for a man to have all the qualities in this article, but if he doesn’t want to marry you or get married at all, you need to look elsewhere. When a man meets a lady he wants to marry, he usually knows early on. The timing may not be right, for instance he might want to be more established in his career, but he will definitely let the lady know that he is intent on marrying her. A man, however nice and becoming of character he might be is not husband material if he does not want to get married to you or to anyone at all.
These are some of the qualities you should look out for in a man who is husband material. Together with the article nine types of men you should marry, the qualities stated above will definitely help you and prevent you from wasting your time with a man who is clearly not cut out for marriage!
xoxo, Lush
No comments